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The Return of the Quotes Page


Real People (More on the way soon)
(Most of the names have been omitted to protect the innocent. These people know who they are.)
[People across the world file sharing on IRC] - Sorry about the speed... that damn pond is between us =)
[Walking into my room holding his hard drive in one hand] - Hey, there's the man I wanted to see!
[1 week later - I walk into his room with my hard drive as I try to extract my lab report from my hard drive]
[Me threatening my computer] - Don't make me boot you up in Windows 98!
Yeah I'm that paranoid!
Yankees Suck.
My love life is so pathetic I can't even turn my own computer on.
I think I stink.
It's too cold.
I don't know.
You are so beyond fucked. You couldn't even take a bus back to fucked.
Dude, you've got a blue screen. Oh fuck!
Spherical coordinates are particularly useful for people that live on planets.

Movies (In no particular order)
Your not all-powerful. Well I should be. Someday, I will be the most Powerful Jedi ever. ~Star Wars, Episode II
I hate being smart. You always know what is going to happen. There's never any suspense. ~Bandits
Its Not that I'm Lazy, its that I just don't care. ~Office Space
I see you've been missing a lot of work. Well, I wouldn't say I've been "missing" it Bob. ~Office Space
And what do you burn apart from witches? More Witches! ~Monty Python (Holy Grail)
Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries! ~Monty Python (Holy Grail)
Fuck you, Fuck you, Fuck you, you're cool, Fuck you, I'm out. ~Half Baked
No, not that! Yes... that. ~Spaceballs
Found anything yet? Nothing yet sir. How about you? Not a thing sir. What about you guys? We ain't found shit! ~Spaceballs
But why male models? Are you serious? I just answered that like 5 minutes ago! ~Zoolander
Why are women like hurricanes? Because when they arrive they are wet and wild, and when they leave they take the house and the car. ~Traffic
How did you get it so warm.... I can taste the bubbles... No wait - I can't taste the bubbles... ~American Pie II
I kind of super-glued myself to... myself. ~American Pie II
All you need is love. John Lennon. Smart man. Shot in the back - very sad. ~Independence Day
Oh no, you did not just shoot that green shit at me. ~Independence Day
Well, actually that was just footage from the movie Independence Day. But the real laser will look a lot like that. ~Austin Powers II
Blue flower, red thorns, blue flower, red thorns - this would be so much easier if I wasn't color-blind! ~Shrek
You sold me queer giraffes. ~Gladiator
Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife, and I will get my vengeance, in this life or the next. ~Gladiator
Dodge This. ~The Matrix
Is it AM or PM? AM - very, very AM. ~Apollo 13
The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. ~ Star Trek, The Motion Picture.
And don't go trying any of those old cheap tricks on me. Oh no, I've got all new cheap tricks. ~Ghostbusters II
You didn't sleep with it, did you Ray? ~Ghostbusters II
You had best unfuck yourself, or I will unscrew your head and shit down your neck! ~Full Metal Jacket
Captain ... I believe I speak for everyone here, sir, when I say, "To Hell with our orders." ~Data, Star Trek: First Contact Assimilate this. ~ Star Trek: First Contact
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Sir Lancelot: Knightz of the Round Table